Back to Work

And just like that...my maternity leave is over. When I was pregnant, I thought that being home for almost three months with a newborn would seem like forever, that it would drag on and on. Everyone told me that it would go by fast, but I kept thinking "It's almost three MONTHS...I haven't been home for that long without working since I was in high school!" Well, they were right and I was wrong. I feel like I blinked and it was over. And yet...the entire thing seems like a blur! I think back to the first eight weeks or so when Emery was so incredibly fussy and high-maintenance and how if you had asked me then, I would have told you that I couldn't wait to go back to work. I craved adult interaction, a set schedule and a break from hearing her cry all day. But now I wish that I had appreciated even those really frustrating moments a little more, because obviously I can't get them back now. And the last three or four weeks when she really started interacting and turning into a fun baby are so precious to me, and I am so incredibly grateful that I had this time with her. I know that there are many people who can't spend almost 12 weeks at home with their babies, so I do know how lucky I am. I will tell you, though, that it doesn't make it any easier to make this transition.

Wednesday Sept. 17th was my first day back in the office. I have to say that it wasn't the best day of my life...leaving Emery was very difficult, even though she is staying most of the time with Lesley (my mother-in-law) so I know she is in great hands! When I got to work I found that I did not have a work station because our offices are being renovated and they have everyone crammed into one tiny space. They simply have no room for me, and I am stuck out in a hallway at a table. Yes, that's right - in a hallway. It is very distracting and I can already tell that I cannot do my job effectively there. I will need to divide my time between the office (if you can call it that!) and working from home, I believe, in order to get anything productive done. I realize that everyone is making sacrifices in order for the renovations to occur, but it was not really how I envisioned my first day back!

The other issue is that I am still breastfeeding and I am trying so hard to continue as long as I can. I do believe that it's the best thing I can do for Emery and my goal was to stick it out at least until she was 6 months old. Therefore, I am pumping at work - let me tell you, it is a pain. Especially with the renovations, there is really no convenient place for me to pump. There is a single bathroom with a lock on the door - however, that's really not an acceptable place (in my opinion) for me to handle what is essentially food for my baby. The only other option is a secure room that is used to count money - it actually is nice...it has no windows, a lock on the door, outlets, and I can continue to work in there while I pump. The only problem is that I have to work around the people who use that room, so I can't pump when I need to and I am afraid that my supply will suffer as a result. Yesterday I was unable to pump as much as Emery ate that day, so I fear I am starting down a slippery slope of dipping into my freezer supply to make up the difference, and I'll eventually have to start supplementing. I know it isn't the end of the world, but the way I see it, having to work shouldn't force me to make that decision. Again, I think that working from home a bit will help with the pumping situation until the renovations are complete.

Other than those pretty significant issues, I am happy to be back around adults and dive into my Luncheon again. It is very difficult to leave Emery in the mornings and I get very little time with her in the evenings because she tends to want to go to bed around 8:00 or even earlier. That's a big change from being with her almost 24 hours a day for the last 11 weeks, and I know that I will just have to get used to it. It is an unfortunate thing to have to work and leave your child, but many mothers do it without impacting their relationship with their baby - which is my biggest fear. I will just have to make the most of the time I have with her in the evenings and weekends.

In other news, Emery had her 2-month doctor's appointment two weeks ago and she was 11lbs, 3oz already! That is 70th percentile for her weight. She is about 23 inches long (50th percentile) - so our child continues to be short & fat. I am very pleased with her growth and so is the doctor! We are keeping her on the reflux medicine since it seems to be doing the trick.

Adam is taking another class at UVA, a cell biology course that he seems to really like. He had his first test yesterday and believes that he did pretty well! He also has a little over a month left of the season at Kings Dominion, which I feel can't get here fast enough. I really miss having him here with me on the weekends.

And now, I am off to continue getting ready for work.